Sometimes people get the wrong idea about Christian dating. Even many Christians fall into the myths that surround dating among the Christian faith. There are many misconceptions about faith and the attitudes we are supposed to have towards others. Our attitudes towards dating can even influence the types of dates we get and the fun we have with them. If you believe in Christian myths about dating, you might be creating an atmosphere around your dates that is not what you want.
Let’s take a look at these myths and uncover the truth about Christian dating:
The Good Ones Are Taken Already
As we begin to get older and still without a mate, we sometimes begin to feel as though we are all alone in the world. This can lead us to think that we are somehow going to miss out on having a great mate that can share in our walk with the Lord. The truth is, God can bring us anyone at any time. You can rest assured that there is someone out there that is fantastic just like you. You simply have to be willing to strike out into the dating world with convictions about what you want for yourself. The good ones are not already taken. Some people are very careful about who they date and are waiting on the perfect situation. They might be waiting for you!
God Doesn’t Want Me to Find a Mate
The Bible is very clear about wanting us to find a mate. He created Eve for the purpose of giving Adam a mate and creating a planet full of people. If He wanted us to be alone He would have made it so from the beginning and spelled it out in His word. God wants you to live a life that is full of happiness and sharing. Growing close to God alongside a mate that shares your convictions is the greatest feeling in the world, and well worth searching for.
God Will Bring My Special Person to Me
Like most things in life, God allows us to search. If we are willing to seek someone special, then God will certainly help make that possible. He is not going to simply knock down the door with a million mates that all believe as you do. You have to get out there and fellowship! Spend some time getting to know some potential singles and learn about what they have to offer. You might be shocked at how many people fit you once you start looking around.
Christians Can’t Have Fun
Of all the silly Christian myths that are out there, this one always makes me laugh the hardest. Christians can do anything that non-Christians can. They simply choose to do things that are not sinful. It is a pleasure to live this type of lifestyle for Christians and that is something that most can’t relate to. It is not a slavery thing or a feeling of loss. It is actually quite the opposite.
Being a Christian and dating is actually the very definition of fun. Many Christians go to the movies, bowling, picnics, sporting events, dances and various other forms of fun. While some denominations are stricter with their standards than others, they are doing what they are convicted to do. When God convicts a Christian to do something, they are happy to respond with obedience. It is not something that takes away fun at all. It creates fun on a whole new level. Sharing that with a new partner only doubles that fun.
Dating Online is Somehow Wrong or Unfit for a Christian
There was a time when dating online was a problem for Christians. The odds were quite high that you would end up with potential dates that were not of the same beliefs. A Christian often puts their belief in God first, making it very difficult to have a successful partnership with someone that does not believe. For this reason, dating online got a bad name in the church. Over time, however, online dating has changed. Now, you can literally go to online dating websites that are specifically made for Christians of many different denominations. If you want to find someone that believes, it is very easy. Signing up for these online dating sites is rather easy, and you can certainly find likeminded believers much easier now. It is no substitute for church, but it is wonderful to enhance your dating life.
God is Angry with me and that is why I am Alone
While God certainly wants certain behaviors from us, he is not punishing you with a lifetime of being alone. That goes against virtually everything I have ever read in the Bible. God wants us to be together and to celebrate His glory as a group. That is what church, marriage and fellowship are supposed to be all about. Forcing you to a lifetime of being alone is not something that God would seem to want. It is not in the Bible, and that is clear enough for me.
Singles Groups at Church are Boring
Singles groups at church can be boring, so that is not always a myth. The truth is, anywhere can be boring if you let it be. The truth is, singles groups at church can also be exciting, fun, entertaining, spiritually elevating and fruitful in every way. It really depends on who is attending and the attitudes contained within the group. If you want to enjoy a singles group in church but it is boring and uneventful, then take a moment to come up with some ideas on how to make it better. Church groups need some excitement too, so be the change you are wanting to see.
My Past Sins Prevent Me From Being With a True Christian
This is probably the primary problem for many folks wanting to date a Christian. First of all, true Christians are far from perfect. All of them have sinned just like you and they would be headed for a very bad eternity if not for Jesus Christ. That being said, you should never feel as though your past sins (or your present sins) are too heavy for the Lord. God can cleanse it all away no matter what it is. You have to be willing to ask for forgiveness, accept that forgiveness and walk with God from now own. That walk would include fellowship with other believers. Your partner being a Christian only enhances your odds of being closer to God and it certainly does not preclude you from any earthly relationships.
These are far from the only Christian dating myths that are out there, but they certainly are the most prevalent. As you might notice, a large majority of them are laced with our own guilt and projections. The truth is, God knows we are fragile and flawed and made provisions to fix all of that. We simply need to be willing to accept that and join in fellowship with others that agree. This means dating other Christians as well and it can take a lot of the sting out of trying to find a mate. Others that are seeking the same will be drawn to you like a moth to a light. You simply have to be willing to fly out there and seek.
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